i started therapy about 8 weeks ago after 6 years of procrastination. funny enough TikTok played a huge role in pushing me over the edge (in a positive way, toward seeking help). as a sensitive person i sometimes get so fearful what people might say about me or my videos and i always feel like i am one comment away from my whole day and sense of self and self-regard being ruined. i felt like i was in a fragile place. and this was ON TOP of other challenges i was dealing with. i really struggle to ask for help, so it was a really big step for me that i found a therapist and i am also so grateful to be able to have access to mental health support. i met her and i loved her instantly. she asked me about astrology and she taught me that as a water sign i needed to learn how to tap into my fire. she also is teaching me how to move my locus of control from external (what other people think defines, affects, controls, limits me) to an internal locus of control (what i think, want, feel defines me). this has been so important for me in so many aspects of my life. i’m only at the beginning of this lifelong journey of finding me.
i will always value my sensitivity as a gift and not a hindrance. i want to be affected by other human beings. sometimes it really hurts though, of course. i am still not over my break up which happened about 4 weeks ago now but i am finding my way. what is hurting me most is not the loss itself but the nature of how it h— omg, my brother just called me and he didn’t invite me to drinks with our cousins and i am so sad? what the hell! the music was loud and it sounded so fun and i feel excluded because now i have missed out on this expeirence when i was sitting home and doing nothing. i have nothing inspiring to say anymore! keep feeling everything my dear sunshines i love you. i am off to go get ready for this event that i was so gravely excluded from. HAHAHA. love you byeee <3
TikTok just fed me your video about community love vs individual love, which was EXACTLY what I needed to hear today. Love your videos, glad to have found your work.
I love your TikToks! They are so therapeutic. Thank you for sharing your vaulerbality with us. All the best on your healing journey. 🤍