many of us are stuck in planning mode.
we know what we want to create. but we plan for it more than we allow it to unfold.
there is, of course, wisdom in planning. but there comes a point when planning can become its own form of avoidance.
like watering a plant, the benefit of planning has a limit. it can become destructive — sabotaging all possibilities of life and growth.
through over-planning, we at first nourish, and then drown out our ideas. we bury them in perfectionism, potential scenarios, and thorny questions that, if we're honest, we don't yet need to ask, let alone answer.
we don't need to decide what our niche is to start creating something. we don't need a niche at all
we don't have to have the perfect name to get going, we can always change it later
we don't need to know where any of this is going (we could only pretend to at best)
we don't have to be ready or willing to share something to allow ourselves to create it
"The word “strategy” is a military term, which means a plan of action towards a goal. I want to really emphasize the “a”s in that sentence—there is a practice of narrowing down, identifying one path forward, one strategy, one way, one agenda, one leader, one set of values, etc. Reducing the wild and wonderful world into one thing that we can grasp, handle, hold onto, and advance." — adrienne maree brown, Emergent Strategy
the result of trying to define the perfect "strategy" is often overwhelm. we are terrified of imagined outcomes. we're scared to start. we're scared to not start. the doing, and all it calls on us to confront, terrifies us. the planning is much safer, until it isn't (this is when we reach our creative breaking point).
we've been taught that imperfection and uncertainty are not safe. meticulous planning became our coping mechanism against the vulnerability, uncertainty, and even humiliation of trying.
but sometimes, this comes at a great cost. sometimes, in persistently planning to create, we end up depriving ourselves of the magic of actually creating.
we try to exert control over the uncontrollable, and lose a lot in the process.
why not surrender?
"The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance." — Alan Watts, the Wisdom of Insecurity
i used to try and plan for every word of my podcast, and i quickly learned that was unsustainable and daunting.
i've learned that i don't need to know exactly what i'm going to say. i only need to open up a space for my voice to speak; and to trust in whatever happens next. sometimes i feel great shame when i play back the results. especially at what i did not say; who i left out.
but now that i am devoted to letting go, to surrendering, to trying to accept myself, i feel tapped into a wisdom much bigger than me.
i never knew this was possible until i let it become my experience of the medium. it's not that i feel no fear or anxiety, it's that i've accepted both as part of the process of becoming.
when we plan, we fail to acknowledge the greater wisdom that will reveal itself to us through doing the work, not in thinking about it. we are rewarded by full engagement with this being and becoming.
you will be given all the answers you need not by planning and strategizing — but by engaging in the project itself. by letting it become what it is seeking to be.
"spirituality is most gloriously embodied in our actions — our habits of being." — bell hooks, All About Love
I love the idea that "when the student is ready, the teacher will appear". This has been so true of my experience. The wisdom and voices we need will emerge when we need them, if we keep ourselves open to receiving them -- and returning our offerings to the collective somehow (whether through our art or through our habits of being).
"Dandelions don’t know whether they are a weed or a brilliance. But each seed can create a field of dandelions. We are invited to be that prolific. And to return fertility to the soil around us." — adrienne maree brown, Emergent Strategy
many of the most meaningful parts of our lives exist beyond the realm of control. relationships are another example. we pretend we know exactly what kind of person would love us best.
when we try to exert our dominance over these realms, we cut ourselves off from the possibilities of their fullest Becoming.
it's as though we have a seed in our hands, and we tell ourselves we can control exactly how it will grow.
the perfectionist is the gardener saying, the plant's leaves are not green enough, the flowers not open enough — they are (we are) attempting to exert control on the uncontrollable.
when we do this, we ignore the true nature of growth and creation: always involving a level of unpredictability, uncertainty and insecurity.
when we relate to our creativity and our relationships as seeds, then it becomes clear what is in our control and what isn't:
all we can do is try to nourish the seeds within us and within each other. even this is not in our control, because what nourishment we can offer will depend on how others have nourished us.
we need a society that is nourishing to all the seeds of all people. nourishment is love, community, safety, resources, freedom to exist, love, create, be, and become. this remains a dream; one ever worth fighting for.
an invitation.
to trust in the process
to give up the illusion of control
to choose the reality of imperfection over the fantasy of perfection
to let the seeds within you grow instead of drown under the weight of your fear
to release yourself from the pressure and invite in the play
to liberate the visions within you
to let it become
🎙️ Watch or Listen to Episode 24 here:
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"when we plan, we fail to acknowledge the greater wisdom that will reveal itself to us through doing the work, not in thinking about it. we are rewarded by full engagement with this being and becoming." This part!!!
Your voice is so divinely powerful in all formats. First, I read your words. Then, I listened to your podcast. Now when I read your words, I hear them merge into YOUR physical voice in my head versus me reading them in my own inner voice (yaknow that 1 we all have when reading).
Thanks for sharing your beautiful truth and wisdom, I always am grateful.