thank you for this. «I'm not a machine!" is exactly what i said, almost yelled, weeks ago to my boss at work.
although in my youth i had been consistently struggling, i was never really consistent i.e. a profit maker. but i see now that being THAT consistent is not healthy.
thank you again for your words and this community.
thank you so much Enrico! and thank you for sharing this story with us. I'm sorry you had to remind your boss of your basic humanity, AND I am so proud of you for doing so! wishing you a lovely week and thank you again ❤️
Thank you Christine!! I'm so glad you were intrigued! That literally makes me feel so seen, and you calling it a paradigm shift warms my heart! thank you for leaving this comment bc it makes me feel lots of alignment with you and with my own intention with this post!!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much Maddie! That really means the world to me. " Paradigm shifts every time" omg my heart is like no way really?!! that might be my new love language. Thank you for saying this and for being here, I am so grateful!!!!! ❤️
i listened to this at the perfect time. after feeling like i was thriving for so long, i've entered a more creative/social wintery period in my life and i have been feeling frustrated about why i was feeling so drained and uninspired. but you've reminded me that my environment has changed dramatically and sometimes we all have little winters where we are devoid of pollinators and that is okay! it is capitalism that is telling us it isn't!
also, you're inspiring me to use words like "divine" and "majestic" more in my life. the world is miraculous and beautiful! our language should match it!
love love love your writing on this. I did a lot of thinking on this last year, but I regularly find myself in the consistency trap! You're absolutely right, nature is seasonal. Why don't human beings behave in accordance with nature? Well we know the answer.
I am loving this. What a perfect read after writing to myself about how I'm annoyed that i haven't been more consistent with XYZ. Looking to nature is such a grounding idea, and I love it.
As a child I always loved learning, teaching myself things, reading, I was just a sponge. I remember being given a book to read in primary school , the joy that I had was amazing and I think I finished it in one day. But as I grew up that excitement disappeared. I don't know if it was being constantly compared or this idea that you must always be the best and if you are not, you are not worthy enough. So I think it started to lose it's fun element because I was not learning by virtue of the love I had, but purely for the reason that if I did not archive the best or if someone was better than me, then surely there was something wrong about me. I have a bad relationship with consistency, I always feel like I will never do whatever to my best ability and that means I'm essentially not good enough. Your words really touched me, in saying that I don't have to be perfect because I'm not a machine.
I loved the podcast and now I can enjoy your beautiful notes AND the summary? Once I get my money right I’m putting it in your substack, you’re an amazing creator.
I cannot fully express into words the ways I needed to hear this today. I am currently on a journey of validating my neurodivergence rather than villainizing it and this really felt like a gospel to my body today (and I do not use that word lightly). I have been following your work for over a year now and you always help bring me grounding. thank you for your work it does not go unseen.
Ahhhhh thank you soooo much Ana. This is speaking DIRECTLY to my "if this helps ONE person, it is so deeply worth doing" brain and heart and soul. I'm going to journal about this TODAY, this specific connection. I'm so proud of you for being on the journey of validating your neurodivergence in a world that would have you reject and villainize it as you say, so so proud, and I am so grateful to have been able to have assisted in that journey!!! Ahhhh ONE YEAR PLUS! Thank you so so much for being here and for leaving this comment. "it does not go unseen" -- you are speaking to my soul right now. thank you for your support darling!!! I am cheering you on as you embark on/continue your validation journey!!!! we are with you!!! 💛💛💛💛💛💛
love this. been thinking about this kind of thing a lot in the ways that certain frequencies (as in, fluctuations between modes and intensities of being and becoming) are pathologized in part because of their resistance to the commodification and exploitation of the fruits of their labor. like how if you can always stay on schedule, develop a consistent and repeated routine with adequate "maitenence" to keep you "regulated" and "functioning", be energized / focused / but a bit less energized than your being maybe has access to in order to dull the awareness of your exploitation and to dull the awakening of your calling and radical potential, all of these things combine to make you a "perfect worker", but if your frequency and fluctuation looks like anything else it's seen as not just wrong, but sick, if your modality/frequency fluctuates like crashing tidal wave bursts of existentially rapturous creative explosion of energetic flow for a few days where sleep feels unnecessary because you're dreaming so intensely while you're awake, then being drawn out by those waves into the open ocean where you're adrift swimming in the vastness of grief of the world where all you can do is weep, then wash upon the shore and feel the sand on your skin reminding you of the soft animal of your body and return to connection with others, to sensation, to frivolity, to kinship, then repeat, you're given a label like bipolar and you're told that's just the way your "brain is wired" and that it's always been like that under the surface and always will be as opposed to a very organic reaction to this strange and hostile capitalist machinic veil over the actual ecology we are a part of and have never left
This made feel less isolated and that I don’t fall short because I don’t meet society’s idea of “consistency”.
thank you for this. «I'm not a machine!" is exactly what i said, almost yelled, weeks ago to my boss at work.
although in my youth i had been consistently struggling, i was never really consistent i.e. a profit maker. but i see now that being THAT consistent is not healthy.
thank you again for your words and this community.
thank you so much Enrico! and thank you for sharing this story with us. I'm sorry you had to remind your boss of your basic humanity, AND I am so proud of you for doing so! wishing you a lovely week and thank you again ❤️
Thank you, i love this! I don't always read my email notifications but this one intrigued me. Thank you again, for this paradigm shift!
Thank you Christine!! I'm so glad you were intrigued! That literally makes me feel so seen, and you calling it a paradigm shift warms my heart! thank you for leaving this comment bc it makes me feel lots of alignment with you and with my own intention with this post!!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Wow this is written so beautifully and is so thought provoking. Paradigm shifts every time. Thank you thank you thank you
Thank you so much Maddie! That really means the world to me. " Paradigm shifts every time" omg my heart is like no way really?!! that might be my new love language. Thank you for saying this and for being here, I am so grateful!!!!! ❤️
we = NATURE 🩷
yesss Lyric! Always love to see your name over here. Thank you for being here!!!! ❤️
i listened to this at the perfect time. after feeling like i was thriving for so long, i've entered a more creative/social wintery period in my life and i have been feeling frustrated about why i was feeling so drained and uninspired. but you've reminded me that my environment has changed dramatically and sometimes we all have little winters where we are devoid of pollinators and that is okay! it is capitalism that is telling us it isn't!
also, you're inspiring me to use words like "divine" and "majestic" more in my life. the world is miraculous and beautiful! our language should match it!
love love love your writing on this. I did a lot of thinking on this last year, but I regularly find myself in the consistency trap! You're absolutely right, nature is seasonal. Why don't human beings behave in accordance with nature? Well we know the answer.
another amazing podcast episode, all of them always hit, i feel so lucky to be able to listen to them. 💖
Thank you for sharing, really needed this reminder today ❤️ I've just opened the episode to listen later, already looking forward to it! x
I am loving this. What a perfect read after writing to myself about how I'm annoyed that i haven't been more consistent with XYZ. Looking to nature is such a grounding idea, and I love it.
As a child I always loved learning, teaching myself things, reading, I was just a sponge. I remember being given a book to read in primary school , the joy that I had was amazing and I think I finished it in one day. But as I grew up that excitement disappeared. I don't know if it was being constantly compared or this idea that you must always be the best and if you are not, you are not worthy enough. So I think it started to lose it's fun element because I was not learning by virtue of the love I had, but purely for the reason that if I did not archive the best or if someone was better than me, then surely there was something wrong about me. I have a bad relationship with consistency, I always feel like I will never do whatever to my best ability and that means I'm essentially not good enough. Your words really touched me, in saying that I don't have to be perfect because I'm not a machine.
I loved the podcast and now I can enjoy your beautiful notes AND the summary? Once I get my money right I’m putting it in your substack, you’re an amazing creator.
I cannot fully express into words the ways I needed to hear this today. I am currently on a journey of validating my neurodivergence rather than villainizing it and this really felt like a gospel to my body today (and I do not use that word lightly). I have been following your work for over a year now and you always help bring me grounding. thank you for your work it does not go unseen.
Ahhhhh thank you soooo much Ana. This is speaking DIRECTLY to my "if this helps ONE person, it is so deeply worth doing" brain and heart and soul. I'm going to journal about this TODAY, this specific connection. I'm so proud of you for being on the journey of validating your neurodivergence in a world that would have you reject and villainize it as you say, so so proud, and I am so grateful to have been able to have assisted in that journey!!! Ahhhh ONE YEAR PLUS! Thank you so so much for being here and for leaving this comment. "it does not go unseen" -- you are speaking to my soul right now. thank you for your support darling!!! I am cheering you on as you embark on/continue your validation journey!!!! we are with you!!! 💛💛💛💛💛💛
Wowow so glad I found you!! Just listened to your pod for the first time ❤️❤️
omg YAY I am so glad you found me too!!! Just signed up to your Substack! Thank you for being here!!! ❤️❤️
love this. been thinking about this kind of thing a lot in the ways that certain frequencies (as in, fluctuations between modes and intensities of being and becoming) are pathologized in part because of their resistance to the commodification and exploitation of the fruits of their labor. like how if you can always stay on schedule, develop a consistent and repeated routine with adequate "maitenence" to keep you "regulated" and "functioning", be energized / focused / but a bit less energized than your being maybe has access to in order to dull the awareness of your exploitation and to dull the awakening of your calling and radical potential, all of these things combine to make you a "perfect worker", but if your frequency and fluctuation looks like anything else it's seen as not just wrong, but sick, if your modality/frequency fluctuates like crashing tidal wave bursts of existentially rapturous creative explosion of energetic flow for a few days where sleep feels unnecessary because you're dreaming so intensely while you're awake, then being drawn out by those waves into the open ocean where you're adrift swimming in the vastness of grief of the world where all you can do is weep, then wash upon the shore and feel the sand on your skin reminding you of the soft animal of your body and return to connection with others, to sensation, to frivolity, to kinship, then repeat, you're given a label like bipolar and you're told that's just the way your "brain is wired" and that it's always been like that under the surface and always will be as opposed to a very organic reaction to this strange and hostile capitalist machinic veil over the actual ecology we are a part of and have never left